Does time heal all wounds.....no, but you do learn to live with the pain and it becomes a new reality.
I honestly don't believe that pain that has been caused to my kids due to my divorce and everything that went down for years after will every be completely gone or healed. I have watched the kids develop issue as they struggled to deal with the divorce and seen how their behaviour changed. As time passed I have been able to correct some of the behaviours but it requires time and an incredible amount of patience.
I don't think my kids have a true sense of "home", their personal effects are spread between 2 houses, and now that they are away at school it is divided between 3 places. They don't have one place that they can describe as "their room" a personal sanctuary that is all theirs, that they grew up in, a place that provides stability. When they can't find something and ask me if I know where it is and I have to answer...."its at your mother place". I hate having to say that, sometimes it is like they are nomads going from one house to another.
What makes it even worse is when there are different rules and routines at each house. This causes constant friction with the kids. The "x" and I do not agree on a lot of the rules, add this no to the introduction of a step mother with her own ideas on how a house hold should run and things become complicated. I feel for my kids when it comes to this, constantly having to adapt to different rules and never feeling like they have a true home.
As much as I try and make a environment that feels like home it is difficult to create that environment.
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